Mobile phones are the only things in live of which men talk about having the smallest.

  A lawyer says ’we’ won’ or ’You’ have lost.

  All computers wait at the sames speed.

  Real anarchists play chess without kings.

  Monday is one seventh of your life!

  When I was young I begged God for a bike, but God does not work that way... so I stole a bike and begged for forgiveness!

  Aiming to remain good sports, we park as close as possible near the sports centre.

  Money ressembles fat... there is plenty of it, but always in the wrong places.

  No-one loves hard work more than the one who pays for it.

  Some people live because it is illegal to kill them!

  Richness has eternal value if we use it to make others happy.

  Everybody wants to go to heaven, but no one wants to die...

  There are days that nothing goes your way, but does it help to complain? No, not a bit. So, stand up to it, list all the points and put your schoulders to the wheel, even worries go away.

  Learn to live every moment of happiness, are never too busy to receive or give love.

  We have to make a choice, the truth or the appearances. You can loose yourself if you are never you.

  The sea consists of water drops, the sand dunes of grains of sand, time of moments, use them with common sense!

  Today is the day ... It comes only once- ... because tomorrow ...is no longer today. Enjoy life... it is possible ...but do it today ... because today is the day

  When you yell 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, you would have produced enough energy to warm one cup of coffee. ( Niet echt de moeite dus!)

  You can’t walk in the light without causting a shadow

  Without the rubber tree the whole world would have AIDS

  If you hit every time the target is too near or too big.

  The greatest lesson in life is to know that even fools are right sometimes

  The secret of success lies not in doing your own work but in recognizing the right man to do it.

  People are not afraid of how bad you are, People are afraid of how good you are.

  Trains never follow the schedule, they follow the rails

  The one who asks is a fool for 5 minutes, the one who does not ask, remains a fool for ever

  It is better to know everything of one subject, than to know something of everything.

  The past becomes longer and longer and the future shorter and shorter, the hope in the future is bigger than the regrets for the past

  Never drive faster thant you guardian angel can fly !

  Getting an other boyfriend or husband is like buying a house. You have to improve yourself.

  When you choose not to make a choice, you do choose because you choose not to choose.

  Life is hard, learn from the mistakes of others and not of your own mistakes !

  When you turn you nose 180 degrees, you would drown when it rains

  Children in the backseat cause accidents... Accidents in the back seat cause children.

  People wasted a lot of time talking about who came first, the chicken or the egg, but it was surely the cock.

  Life is hard, but the front of a train is harder...

  Learn from the mistakes of others... you can’t live long enough to make them all yourselves!!

  Life is like toilet paper, long and usefull !!!!

  A fart is nothing more than a lost cough.

  One day you will find the woman of your life and at that point you will already be married.

  I only drink to make my wife look prettier.

  It is weird that my nose is running and my feet smell.

  Love is blind, ladies’ underwear is braille

  Love based on beauty, dies along with the beauty.

  Be nice to those who smoke, every sigarette may be their last.

  Boredom was the other word for a safe and undisturbed life.

  Do not keep hanging in the past, do not dream of the future, but concentrate on the present.

  Light is faster than sound. That is why people look intelligent, until you hear them speak.

  All mushrooms are eatable. But some you can only eat once.

  Nature is a miracle. One million years ago no one knew people would wear glasses but our ears are at the right spot.

  A pessimist is someone who believes that women are frivolous. An optimist is someone who hopes for this.

  Every good-bye is the birth of a memory

  Every married man knows why they name hurricanes after women

  Common sense and a sense of humour are the sames things but at different speeds. A good sense of humor is just common sense that dances.

  I believe that there is life after death. But I do not think I will live it.

  There are so many things I have to do, that I should better go to sleep.

  You may not be too hard on my secretaries. They are sweet and understanding when I arrive at the office after having a tough day at home.

  Only 17% of all trafic accidents was caused by drunk drivers, so the other 83% was caused by, yes you got it....the sober ones among us!!

  What do you have in common with your husband ? " We married on the same day."

  Good advice,whatever happens, make it look like to intend to.

  Words of a client in an antique shop: do you have anything new ?